When it comes to dating girls, one question always comes to mind- how do I keep her interested.
Just as talking to women, most guys face difficulties when texting them.
What to say, how to react, should you flirt…
In this article, I will go over several tips and tricks you would want to keep in mind when wondering how to keep a woman interested over text.
Everything Needs To Feel Natural
This is a crucial aspect of the dating game over text.
Often, men get the wrong impression that there is some rush. If you get the girl to respond or even better if you manage to provoke some interest in her- that’s great. You can go from that point forward.
However, if you are trying to connect to a girl that you haven’t had the chance to talk to all that much, keep this in mind- know that there is such thing as too much.
If you are texting a girl who doesn't know you, more often than not it is because you want to date her, right? Well, guess what- women know that for a fact.
And what gives an awful impression is usually connected to two things- texting her all the time and/or acting needy and pushy.
Remember, your goal is to create interest and keep it. Later, it can turn into lust and passion.
However, if you are sending her message after message with no break in between, you aren't doing yourself a favor.
Send A Meaningful Text That Sets The Mood
Your intent is to date her, right?
This is precisely what you should achieve with your texts.
The factor that decides whether she will go out with you or not lies simply in the
intent you put in your messages for the girl.
Thus, an excellent guiding line is only to send her texts that will get you one step closer to taking her out.
Now, you might want to give her hints about your plans. And the best way to achieve this task would be by sending her texts that will set up the mood.
And the best at doing this are compliments and jokes.
Complimenting her is a direct sign you want a rapport. Joking presents your funny side, resulting in the girl growing her interest and wanting to date you on her own.
You can show your intentions by using something similar to:
“I was thinking about you and…”
“You won't believe what happened…”
An important note- while you want to keep her interest, this isn't your intent.
To keep her interest means that you see the girl as nothing more than a friend and you want to get on friendly terms with her.
Your purpose, however, is to date her. So make sure that your texts are gradually creating your image of her future boyfriend.
Don’t Randomly Text Her
A crucial point to remember is that you can't just text a girl whenever you want. And I am not talking about a specific time of the day.
What I am referring to is to text her within the first 24 hours of meeting her.
Several years ago, men believed in the 3-day-rule. This goes to say, guys were expected to text a girl within three days of talking with her.
Nowadays, however, women admit they prefer to be texted as fast as within the first 24 hours.
Take this into consideration- you need to be active in terms of texting her.
You cannot simply meet her and text her a week later. It doesn’t work that way.
Don’t Panic If She Doesn’t Seem Interested Straight Away
Let’s be honest- if you are trying to impress a girl you have a crush on, it will be normal to feel stress and anxiety. This is pretty much inevitable.
However, there is something about it you need to pay attention to- this “fear” can drive you crazy and ruin everything.
Imagine you are making a move and starting a text conversation. You send her a message, maybe two, and wait for a reply. This is quite normal, right?
But what happens after that? You simply gaze at the screen, and the more you wait for the girl to reply, the more worries you gather.
Even if the girl is offline and has no chance of seeing your message.
And suddenly, you feel like your text wasn’t good enough. So you send another one, or even worse- you correct the first one.
Trust me with this one- just think before you send the very first text, send it, and leave it in the past.
If the girl is offline, turn off your phone and focus on your projects.
Reality is, the more you are looking at the damn chat, the more nervous you are getting, and the higher the chances of you screwing things up.
Understand More About Her Personality And Mirror/React To It To Impress Her Over Text
All girls are different. This means that they will also vary dramatically in terms of personality, liking, interests and passion.
And while you will need more time and text conversations to find out all the information about her that you want and must know, you need to do something first.
Think about her personality. What kind of a girl is your lady? Is she shy or outgoing, does she prefer going to clubs than watching movies at home or vice-versa, does she enjoy to get all the attention or does this thought frighten her?
These are some excellent examples of questions you need to answer to determine the most effective way to connect to the girl.
If you speak her “language,” you naturally stand a better chance of making a good impression and catching her attention.
And if you show her that both you share a similar passion, you will definitely get her interested in you.
Find The Proper Time To Text Her To Get Her Interested
Everyone is busy and has work to do. This is also valid for the girl you are trying to impress.
However, you won't achieve much if you are interfering with her projects. And even though you are approaching her with the very best of intents, if you are continually trying to start a conversation when she is short of time, you will most likely fail.
What you need to do is try and figure out her schedule. If you can meet the girl or have a small talk with her, ask her if she has any projects she is working on and/or about the time of the day she is most busy.
If you cannot meet her regularly, you may try to ask her friends for some help. In fact, if you aren’t afraid, you can ask the girls that your lady spends time with for some help. This might definitely ease the task.
And, in the last case, you don’t know much about the girl, you don’t know her friends and you cannot find out much about her routine. All you have is a way to text her. Well, in that case, send the message and forget about it (mentioned in the previous point).
After all, you want to connect to her and there is nothing wrong with it. In fact, you might try and if you feel like it, send her a text for a good morning or good night. These are usually parts of the day that she won't be working on her projects, so you stand a good chance of making her interested and setting up the mood.
But, after all, you need to go after it. If you feel like it, then simply do it!
Keep The Text Conversation Going- Don’t Just Shut Up
You might know something about the girl, or you might be texting her for the first time trying to get to know her better.
It doesn’t matter. What does is that you should hold a normal conversation.
And just like any talk, there will be times where you will be short of words.
In this case, don’t merely stop texting her or say something dumb like:
“I don’t know what to say.”
“I don’t know what to talk about.”
Or anything similar to these two. For some reason, some guys send precisely these types of messages. No wonder they never get the girl!
If you are short of ideas, search for new topics. Ask her questions about her preferences and interests.
There will be something that both of you share and enjoy. And once you find that topic, add your own thoughts to it.
What you also can do is find something that you have in common. It doesn’t matter the activity, but simply talking about something that is pleasant for both of you will provoke positive feelings and emotions.
Furthermore, if you get a good idea of an activity you both enjoy, why don’t you ask her to hang out and practice that “passion”?
If she is interested in sports, why don’t you ask her out to play a game together?
If she is a gamer, why don’t you join her team and have a fun match?
You see, once you get a small lead, you can work from there. But don’t let the fact you cannot think of a topic at the moment scare or stop you.
There are many ways to pivot and succeed. You just need to search for them.
Build Up Her Interest Towards You
The only way to keep her interested over text would be by keeping a pleasant discussion going.
For that, you need to find out things that intrigue your girl.
A good way to get a conversation going as well as get to know her would be by asking her questions.
Keep it funny, a bit silly and playful:
“I am so hyped about (insert movie). Who is your favorite character?”
“If you could have one superpower, what would it be?”
“What do you think of bad boys?”
You see how things are going. Find something that is interesting and you can freely talk about. A plus for both of you will be if you are actually passionate about the topic.
And, in this sense, avoid annoying phrases that will get you to nowhere.
You might want to stay away from lines like:
“Hey, how ‘s it going?”
This isn't a perfect opener because her typical response would be “Not much, how about you?”
You want something that can provoke and intrigue, and in the above scenario after her reply there is a void that feels exceptionally awkward.
Text Her About Something That Occurred When You Met
A way to keep the interest is to text her about something exciting that happened around the time you met.
This will instantly bring back some positive memories that you will be associated with.
Furthermore, be as outgoing and fresh as you possibly can.
Make her laugh, make her smile, sparkle that emotion inside her.
And this goes to say, avoid texts and topics that lead to nowhere. Instead of texting her something like: “Hey, It's (name), how are you?” send her a joke.
The response in most cases will be much better.
Level Up Your Texting Game
A great way to present yourself in a positive light would be to avoid bad grammar.
Check the words before you send her the message, make sure your texting is on point.
Another way to figure out how she would want to be texted is by observing and copying her.
For instance, let's take a look at emojis.
How many emojis can you spot in the girl's texts?
If the girl sends an emoji every other text, or maybe once in 10 sentences, it seems kind of weird for you to use several emojis in every single sentence.
Furthermore, this applies to text speak- the usage of ”LOL,” “LMAO,” “D,” etc.
Pay close attention to the way she texts you and mimic it in your own approach.
Send Her Funny And Exciting Pictures To Capture Her Attention
A great way to connect to a girl is by sending her a picture or a video of what you are doing. Even better if your action is intriguing and can provoke curiosity.
What girls find exceptionally attractive in men are their passion and ambition. An effective way to stand out from the crowd is by pursuing a bodacious goal.
Girls want to see that their boyfriends are passionate, dedicated and committed to their dreams.
And a great way to show her is by sending her a picture or even a video.
If you can manage to make it both funny and intriguing, you are surely going to provoke positive emotions inside her.
Show Her Your Romantic, Sweet And Passionate Side
Usually, guys believe that they should act tough, hide their emotions and show as much masculinity as humanly possible.
While there is some truth to that, however, this isn't always the case.
In fact, girls are often intrigued by men who show their soft and romantic side.
Remember, girls love everything that is somewhat cute, sweet, adorable and heart-touching.
Therefore, your romantic and charming side might be the key to her heart. This can possibly be exactly what your girl is searching for.
And as far as cute and sweet things go, they can differ in meaning- you can give her a sudden compliment, tell her a passionate quote or an engaging story.
Sweet texts are likely to improve her day and give her a big smile (and she will remember that).
You can go as the following:
“It is so hard to get you out of my mind. I literally can't stop thinking about you.”
“You brighten up my day like no one else.”
“You cannot imagine how glad I am to have you in my life…”
Avoid Bad-Mouthing And Jokes About Others
As we already mentioned, an effective way to connect to a girl and get the talk going is by telling her a joke.
However, there is a thin line between what is appropriate and what is unacceptable.
More often than not, guys try to brag out a little bit to present themselves in a positive light, right?
Nevertheless, you aren’t scoring any point when you do this at the exchange of humiliating someone else.
Moreover, it is okay if you are excited about something important you have achieved and want to share it with the girl.
However, you definitely need to make sure it doesn’t sound like you are showing off.
Listen To Her
A great way to catch a girl’s attention is by showing that you are listening carefully to the things she is saying. Even better if you remember something that she has mentioned before.
Just the act of being a good listener sets you apart from the other guys (mostly because they pay little to no attention to their girls).
This directly implies that she is someone special to you. Showing a girl that you remember things she has talked about before is a great way to charm her and start building the rapport.
“Hey (name), what happened with your (insert something specific) project that you were so worried about?”
“Is (insert her pet's name) feeling better today?”
If you intend to ask her about something she has mentioned, but you have forgotten the specifics, you might want to not talk about the topic at all.
Whenever you are showing the girl that you have forgotten something vital about her- her job, her pet’s name, some of her preferences, etc., you are directly telling her she wasn’t worth remembering.
So think before you send her a random text just because you want to fill the void.
Be A Bit Playful
You might have heard that being a badass, acting tough and hard to get is the “trend.” Sorry to say that, but, in reality, it is just the opposite.
Women want a guy who can connect to them effectively, is not afraid to tease them and has the guts to ask them out.
Teasing is something girls love. When you are getting a bit playful over text, you are scoring points for yourself.
“I adore you on so many levels- you are cute and sweet, but when you get angry, you become my type :)”
Don’t Be Afraid To Flirt
Often guys wonder whether they should flirt or not, if the right time has come or not.
My advice is- if you feel like it, go for it.
There is no point to keep her interested in you if you are searching for a text buddy.
And to show the girl your intentions, flirting over text will do the job perfectly fine.
Keep the playful part, and try your best to provoke passion and make her bite her lips!
“Send me a picture of you so I can show Santa what I want as a present.”
“There is no word in the dictionary that can define your beauty.”
“I find it so hard to concentrate- I just can't stop thinking about you.”
You MUST Ask Her Out
Once again, this is the main focus. All the approaches and examples above become useless if you don’t have the balls to pull the triger.
Texting might be a bit complicated and confusing, especially if you are unsure what to say.
However, this shouldn’t be the case.
In fact, you should feel thrilled and excited about texting a girl you like.
If you are searching for more insight on how to attract a girl over text, a great point of reference is “Text That Girl”- a fantastic guide that aims to help you get a date with a girl over several simple messages.
If you are done with wondering whether a girl might like your texts or not, and finally start picking up the beautiful women over text, you can read our full review.