First of all, I want to congratulate you - you have dared to approach a girl, ask her out, and successfully go on a date with her. This, on its own, is a move many guys aren’t brave enough to make. The feeling of passion and romance in the atmosphere and joy in her eyes…
And now you are back after the date at your place, your mind is all over her, and my guess is, you want to meet the girl again, get more of her. Of course, who wouldn’t?
Nevertheless, I have to warn you that you can still screw things up. Just because you have successfully taken a gorgeous girl out doesn’t mean that it is a slam dunk.
She can still lose interest in you, and you can still screw it up if you let yourself loose.
For that matter, here is a list of things to take into consideration to ensure you get the best results and get her willing to go out with you again and again.
Texting A Girl After A Date
1. Don’t Be Impatient
A good question many guys ask themselves is how long should I wait after the date to text a girl. Many people say that you should text a girl whenever you want- if you feel like texting her right after the date, then you should. Well, technically, you can.
But more often than not, that doesn’t seem to do you much good. I suggest you approach her from several hours after the date to no longer than one day after the date. It would be really odd if you went out with a girl, both of you had a good time, she didn’t text you back for 4-5 days, and suddenly she appeared again, right?
You see, girls genuinely love a guy who has something going in his life. On the other hand, nobody is interested in a man who spends all his time chasing women and thirsting after them. That makes you look quite creepy and needy.
So, an excellent way to determine is to simply think how did your date go. Was there a strong vibe between both of you? Did you get more intimate? Do you believe you are over the face of initial dating and have entered the phase of boyfriend and girlfriend?
As a general rule, the more serious the relationship is, the more often you can text. I suppose you are still somewhere around ground zero when you are getting to know the vibe of one another. In this case, I would wait at least a couple of hours before I text her back.
But remember, you should contact in about 24 hours of your initial date. If she is not going to make a move, you will have to text her first. And for that, you should refer to the next step.
2. Don’t Go All Over Her When Texting
A foolish mistake too many guys make is that they feel the need to try and express just how wonderful and magical the date was, how they cannot stop thinking about the girl, and how they want to text and text, and date and date, and this becomes so lame and lame…
You get the joke. But seriously, showing appreciation for the good time is one thing, and simping is entirely different.
In the first step, I said you should have, or at least act like you have a lot going on in your life- this is a genuine code for attractiveness. So, what happens when you start showering her with compliments, and not taking your eyes off the chat?
To put it simply, the girl is most likely surrounded by other boys who are simps, also referred to as ”white knights”. The lady is constantly getting tons of compliments and validation from her surroundings. And an excellent way to attract her is to act in the opposite direction.
Do not compliment her every time you speak, and do not blindly agree with everything she says, and don’t simply do whatever she wants you to do. Show her that you are also in control.
And the same can be applied to texting. There is a flame of interest, passion, and desire when she cannot have you easily. This is a natural craving, set in our genes- we want what we cannot have.
So don’t be going all willy nelly over her, pretty much like a dog in her knees. Keep your act together, know that if you act calm and present yourself as someone she can respect, guess what - she will naturally respect you and, as a result, want you more.
3. Don’t Show Irritation
This one is also vital for your success not only in online dating but with girls in life as a whole.
Let’s look at an example - you are in the initial stages of dating. You have taken the girl on 1-2-3 dates, and things seem to be going alright. However, this doesn’t mean that she is necessarily all over you yet.
There is more attraction to be built until you reach the next point of the relationship. And one thing that really pisses girls off is when guys are butthurt.
As a man, you are the one supposed to emit masculinity, to be strong, to dictate and dominate. In fact, all these characteristics drive women nuts. Which goes to say what?
That you being butthurt by small insignificant things makes you lose your attractiveness. And this will quickly show in your initial text messages, especially if you don’t have much experience dealing with women.
For instance, when you are trying to arrange your next date. Let’s assume that everything goes alright, and you suggest a time and place. Let’s also say that this will be somewhere in the afternoon on the weekend.
And suddenly, your girl says that she has a busy schedule and isn't sure how much time she will have because of several things she has planned to take care of.
In majority of the time, you will react in a pissed-poor way, being irritated, and more importantly, showing your irritation to the girl.
And this is a massive turnoff for every girl. If you are going to whine and cry about all the small things that don’t mean a thing looking at the big picture, you are in for a lot of trouble.
Would you date a girl that always wants to have it her way and gets intimidated when you want to have some free time to take care of something important to you? If the answer is yes, you most likely have serious personal issues and should stop dating that person.
The same goes here. Remember masculinity- you are the man, the alpha. He dominates, he dictates, and he doesn’t allow small fry to put him at an emotional discomfort.
4. Don’t Rush The Relationship
As guys, we want the intense craving and desire of a woman. We want to make her ours, we need her committed to us and only us.
If you have taken her on a couple of dates, you might feel like things are going better than you initially expected, and you think you should move the relationship further.
You should listen to your gut instinct in this regard. However, even if the time to take this approach is right, do not do it over text.
Certain things should be done over text, and certain ones should be done in person. And, as evident as this is, this one, by all means, should be done in person, ideally followed by a hug, kiss, and cuddle.
5. Everything Should Feel Natural
I already mentioned not to rush and to have patience. But, this doesn’t mean you cannot contact the girl or text her.
Simply make sure that it sounds like you had a pleasant activity together, and you really enjoyed it. Moreover, you can add additional emphasis to your message by referring, for instance, to how funny a story she told was and that you really had a blast/good time.
This seems natural, this feels normal and is provocative in the right order.
Speaking of order, you would have already started thinking about your next date, right?
I believe that it would be best to arrange the next date between the two of you in another text conversation, be it the following day or two days later.
Ideally, if you were out around the evening and each of you came back home, all you should say is that you really enjoyed spending time and having fun with her, and wish her a good night. As simple as this.
And on the next day, for instance, you should have another small text conversation to set the time for the next one. Doesn’t this feel a bit more natural?- You are still getting what you want, but you aren’t needy or pushy.
6. Don’t Just Give Her Attention
This is one of my favorite parts. There is something that girls love, in fact, they crave it, and that thing is called attention.
Nowadays, with all the social recognition that is occurring in our life, many girls can go over the board for receiving attention, becoming pretty much obsessed.
And yes, while this obviously doesn’t apply to all women, all girls indeed seek attention, some simply more than others.
An interesting approach would be to show affection towards her, but not freely give her all the attention. I expect that if you have gone on several dates already, and have gotten a good feeling towards one another, and she will be seeking attention from you.
So, when this happens, and the girl wants to text you again and again, without having anything much to say, you can quickly reply that you are busy working on a project, a business venture, whatever it is, and that you will get back to her later.
This creates an interesting effect - on the one hand, it makes you more attractive with everything you have going on already. On the other hand, you start building more and more anticipation in her, and she will become even more eager to get a date with you.
You are using her inner drive against her for your benefit. However, make sure that you give her a bit of attention, make it know that you are interested in her and feel attraction towards her. But don’t just give all the attention away and blindly do what she says.
7. Raise The Level Of Sexuality
This is one crucial element in the aspect of all relationships. I will be honest with you here, and I will tell you something I have learned myself, but it seems like not that many people talk about this.
And the simple thing I am talking about is sex/sexual tension. If your girl was constantly texting you to get together and go wild under the sheets, how would you feel? My guess is, you would immediately go to her place and give her what she wants.
Well, it is not that much dissimilar for her. If you want to have a happy and lasting relationship, there needs to be a sexual attraction towards one another. You need to flirt with her, indicate that you are thinking about her, and want her.
Not that this is your only goal, or that you are some kind of a creep pervert. Nevertheless, you can build some serious sexual attraction over text. So don’t be afraid to be a bit “aggressive” and to give her an idea of what you want to do with her on the next date.
This is a problem many guys face. You went on a date, everything was great, the girl liked you, you loved her, and that’s it. And you continue to repeat this pattern over the next dates, and the texts alongside them.
But you never opened your mouth or made real effort to move the connection between more in the sense of a relationship with physical intimacy. And, frankly speaking, girls are looking forward to sex.
When you emit an aura of sexiness, you can even skip the date and lock her on the spot. It is the sex appeal, the game, the thrill and passion that genuinely switch a girl on and makes her mind go blind.
And if you don’t put the work on this aspect, you don’t have to concern yourself whether you are texting her in the right manner after a date or not. If she is sexually attracted to you, she will be continually texting you, and wanting to have fun with you.
If you would like to get a better understanding of the whole process of rapport, from the first text to seducing her and getting her obsessed to meet you and go in bed with you, I suggest you read “Turn Her On Through Text”. This is arguably the best guide out there that covers the whole spectrum of successful online dating. If you are interested in this guide, feel free to read our review.